The Word

The word ‘vagina*’ seems to be trending right now.  Last week, two female Michigan State congresswomen were barred from speaking on the House floor after using the word “vagina” while debating an anti-abortion bill. It has triggered the hashtag #sayvagina on Twitter and, as I have a Google Alert on the word “vagina,” my inbox has been flooded.

I personally don’t have a problem with the word. I use it hundreds of times a day and I bravely put it in the title of my book. The Vagina Buffet was the original title for my book, but when other people got involved, it changed. It went from ‘The Vagina Buffet’ to ‘The V Files,’ then to ‘The Whole Office Knows About my Vagina’ and for a short time, it was ‘The Pink Cupcake.’ Everyone had an opinion on the title of my book and finalising it was making my head explode.

The Vagina Buffet is actually a chapter in the book. It doesn’t refer to an all-you-can-eat smorgasbord of vaginas, but a statement my Renal specialist made to me during an appointment with him. I had to block out all the opinions on the title and go with my gut. It is my book after all and I stand behind it.  

There has been reactions though, and some not so fun.

When I changed the title back to its original name, several people decided to stop communicating with me. A couple of people have un-friended me on Facebook and many friends declined to ‘like’ my author page. Lots of friends refuse to follow me on Twitter and another friend of mine said if I put the word “vagina” on the title of my book she wouldn’t buy it and she wouldn’t support me. That’s ok. I appreciate her honesty. At least she said it to my face.

I struggled with these reactions for some time, I even cried over them. I like to think of myself as a nice person and even though I talk about vaginas a lot, I’m not dirty, and I would certainly never use the “C” word. I always write as if my mum and dad are going to read what I’ve written.

I’ve had to stop and think of the big picture.

I didn’t write this book to get approval from everyone I know. I understand it’s slightly controversial, but there’s an important message I’m trying to get to women and I’m passionate about doing so. 

I’m beyond grateful to all the people who love what I’m doing and have supported me unconditionally. I’m not going to let a few sour grapes ruin my mission. I want women to love their lady bits and I want parents to talk opening and honestly with their daughters about their bodies. After all, vaginas are special, so special in fact, they have their very own doctor and only us girls have them.

I love my vagina and I’m happy being part of the vagina clan.

How about you? How do you feel about your lady garden and can you easily say the word ‘vagina’ out loud?

 

* Yes, I know the correct terminology is vulva. Please don’t spam me.   

 

Comments

[Beth]

I actually now look at my lady garden (that's what I call it now thanks to your book), in a very different light. I now appreciate and respect it. Due to your bravery and creativity, most of the woman in my family who've read the book have either learnt something about their VAGINA's, laughed about their VAGINA's and now love their "VAGINA's".

thanks SJ xo